14-year-old from Paducah discusses her depression and thoughts of suicide to help others in a similar situation

Sophie Henney of Paducah chose two days after her 14th birthday to tell her story of depression and thoughts of suicide. She wanted to share her story—and her name—to help others who may be in the same situation, Genevieve Postlethwait reports for The Paducah Sun.

In Kentucky, 15 percent of teens say they've thought about committing suicide, according to the 2013 National Youth Risk Behavior Survey. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's 2013 data, 11 out of every 100,000 young people die by suicide. Every year between 1999 and 2013, Kentucky ranked 16th in the nation for rate of deaths by suicide for individuals between ages 15 and 24.

On the way to church on New Year's Eve night, Sophie told her mom, Peggy, "I wouldn't hurt myself, but I don't want to go back there to that school. I'd rather be dead." Sophie attended a small private school and hadn't had a pleasant fall semester: the other girls in her class were excluding her, and she had thought some of them were her friends, Postlethwait writes. "We found out several months later she was actually formulating a plan to do it," Peggy said. "As much attention as I was paying to her, I still didn't know. I beat myself up for several months, thinking that there was more I could have done."

Both Sophie and her counselor have released Peggy of the blame, but she still feels responsible. "I could have lost my child," Peggy said. "And there are people here who have lost their child. . . . We can talk about texting and driving; we can talk about drinking and driving; but we can't talk about suicide. We've got to start changing something."

The stigma surrounding suicide and a lack of information about it are two main things that stand in the way of changing the way people talk about suicide, said Laurie Ballew, medical director of Lourdes Behavioral Health. She said people didn't used to talk about cancer because of the stigma. "Now we talk about it," Ballew said. "We're out about it, we're loud about it, and we're educating about it. That's what we need to do with suicide and mental health issues."

Gretchen Roof, site administration at Four Rivers Behavioral Health in Paducah, "said at least once a week a child comes to them at Four Rivers who they worry may be a suicide risk." When that happens, there are several options. Children may see a counselor once per week or every other week. They can go to Four Rivers every weekday after school. In more severe cases, "'partial-hospitalization'"is an option, where the child attends school at the center while also participating in therapy from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m. every weekday," Postlethwait writes. Most of the schools in the area allow Four Rivers counselors to spend approximately one day per week in each school, which removes the need for transportation and the stigma associated with entering a mental health facility.

Roof said that parents, teachers, preachers and kids should not be afraid to talk about depression or suicidal thoughts in themselves or observed in others, Postlethwait writes. "If you have or know a child who appears depressed, or is having some sort of significant change in their behavior, a change in appearance even . . . be especially tuned-in to that child," Roof said. "Don't be afraid of saying, 'I'm concerned about you. What's going on?' and don't be afraid of asking, 'Have you thought about hurting yourself?'" Something people are afraid to ask such questions because they think they will give the person ideas, Roof said, but research shows that is false. "They will tell you, and you are the intervention that has been waiting to happen for them."

Sophie said, "I was very relieved when we went to Christmas break, and by New Years Eve, I was like, I don't want to go back. I want this to be over. I don't want to see them again. The only thing I can really think of to say is, get help. That's what made me better. Tell somebody. Talk to somebody. don't just keep it quiet."

Kentucky's suicide rate is above the national average; experts say we need to ignore the stigma and become educated about it

Kentucky's suicide rate is higher than the national average, and an expert says we must create an open dialogue about it and provide more education if we want this rate to decrease, Kat Russell reports for The Paducah Sun.

"People commit suicide when they see no way out from whatever the situation is," Dr. Laurie Ballew, medical director at Paducah's Lourdes Behavioral Health Institute, told Russell. "Usually people feel hopeless, they see no light at the end of the tunnel, and that hopelessness is a key factor in someone following through with the act of killing themselves."

Russell did an in-depth look at suicide in McCracken County, where the newspaper and its owner, Paxton Media Group, are based. "McCracken County is ranked 13th in the state as far as suicide, so if you take into consideration all of the (120) counties in Kentucky, we're pretty high," Ballew said. Click here to find out where your county ranks.

Kentucky has 15.5 suicides per 100,000 people, compared to 12.5 nationwide. It is the 10th leading cause of death in Kentucky and the second leading cause of death in people 15 to 34, according to the according to the federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Russell reports.

McCracken County Sheriff Jon Hayden told Russell that his department investigated 31 suicides in each of the last two years and five so far this year. The Paducah Police Department reported 31 suicides in 2013 and 35 in 2014, and six suicides this year. The local 911 dispatch center told Russell that it had fielded more than 540 calls threatening suicide and more than 130 attempted suicides since Jan. 1, 2013.

"We get calls multiple times per week, threatening suicide either with medication or a weapon of some sort," Hayden said, noting that most of the calls do not result in suicide and the individual usually gets the help they need.

WebMD lists these warning signs of suicide, which are especially concerning if a person has attempted suicide in the past:

• Always talking or thinking about death
• Clinical depression that gets worse
• Having a "death wish," tempting fate by taking risks that could lead to death.
• Losing interest in things one used to care about
• Making comments about being hopeless, helpless, or worthless
• Putting affairs in order, tying up loose ends, changing a will
• Saying things like "it would be better if I wasn't here" or "I want out"
• Sudden, unexpected switch from being very sad to being very calm or appearing to be happy
• Talking about suicide or killing one's self
• Visiting or calling people to say goodbye

Drug and alcohol abuse also can be factors, Ballew told Russell. "What do those things do? They decrease our inhibition, they decrease our filter that tells us 'Oh no, you don't want to do that.'"

Ballew told Russell if a person's behavior changes are milder, "sometimes showing that person support and compassion can alleviate some of his or her suffering and encourage them to get help," but it is important to seek medical attention for "severe cases."

"If you have an individual who just gets more and more depressed, who won't get out of bed or gets to the point where they can't get out of bed, then you (should) call an ambulance or get them to a hospital and have them admitted," Ballew said, stressing the importance of education and open discussion.

"Emotional illness can hit anybody," she told Russell. "We're all humans. ... Anybody can feel hopeless or helpless at any time. If we could reduce the stigma that is attached to depression and mental illness and suicide, then I think people who are suffering might see that maybe there is some hope. But the only way to prevent something is to be educated about it."

Depression should not be a taboo subject; rural Kentucky news editor details writes about her victory over it

By Tim Mandell
Institute for Rural Journalism and Community Issues

Depression is a subject people often shy away from discussing, but a large percentage of Americans suffer from, or have suffered from, serious depression. Around 50 million have become seriously depressed at some point during their lives, according to a report by the University of Kentucky Cooperative Extension Service. ­

The suicide last month of actor Robin Williams brought depression to the forefront of the national news for a few weeks, but as the national focus shifted to other stories, community journalists should continue to talk about depression, especially in rural areas where people might feel they will be ostracized if they express how they feel.

That’s why it’s important when journalists like Shelley Spillman, news editor of The Anderson News in Lawrenceburg, Ky., step forward and write columns detailing their own battles with depression. Spillman, who was inspired to write a column after Williams’ death and the suicide of a local man who suffered from depression, said in an interview, “This is not something we normally talk about and maybe we should. Maybe these people wouldn’t feel so alone."

"As journalists we’re part of the community too," she said. "I really enjoy people getting to know me, my real struggles in life and the things I’ve been through. It’s amazing how relating to people on a human to human level is one of the most difficult things to do. But it’s so important.”

In her column, Spillman wrote: “I, too, have suffered from the cold, metallic grip of depression. I know what it’s like to be in a room full of people and still feel alone. You’d give anything to feel the warmth of company without having to go through the mental gymnastics of plastering on a fake smile just so you don’t have to be berated with ‘are you OK?’ or ‘what’s wrong?’ It’s not their fault. Most people don’t know how to deal with people who suffer from depression. Even in our daily interactions people stop and ask ‘How are you doing?’ without sticking around long enough to hear anything other than a one-word utterance of ‘Fine.’”

“It does get better; give it time. I understand, though, that giving depression time, when a day with it can feel like carrying around the weight of a giant boulder, seems impossible, but you can. Sometimes when I think about my time with depression it seems so far away, like I’m at the fair soaring on one of those giant swings, examining bad memories of someone else’s life. I can feel black fog of depression permeating in my brain, trying to find a way back in, but I immediately recognize the intruder and sent it packing. Like I said, it’s a parasite, it’s always looking for a host to attach to.”

Spillman added, “You’ll find that you are a lot stronger than you may even realize now. You can make it out of this, and one day the clouds will part and you’ll be able to see the sun again. Let me tell you the sun feels glorious on your skin after a longtime in the dark.”

Spillman told The Rural Blog: “Readers who have called appreciate my honesty in my columns. It’s hard to put yourself out there and be that vulnerable, but I like for my columns to be honest and real. It’s a way for people to know who I am.” She said that writing a column like this is “a good way to get the ball rolling to get people talking about (depression).” She said she hopes columns like this can lead to there being more resources for people with depression, especially in small communities, and lead to depression being a subject that’s less taboo to discuss. (The Anderson News is behind a paywall but can be reached by clicking here.)

The Extension Service report details signs and types of depression, suggestions for those suffering from depression and suggestions for friends and family members of people who are depressed. Other valuable sources are available here, here, here, here and here.